Hi Myrna, That’s such good advice to love little Mister for who he is. The condition rarely passes from one cat to another. I also feel like I wasn’t a good enough mom to her maybe I didn’t deserve her or any other pet. Babe loved the sun room in this house, she loved laying in the windows and watching the birds and she could see me out on the deck. I dealt with a lot of issues the next few years and she was the only consistent thing in my life and loved me unconditionally despite everything. God bless. She had advanced kidney disease. Her first bath, her first kiss.. her milk bowl.. everything is a memory… i need her. She had been perfectly fine only a few hours before. Is this fate speaking to us? The author hit the nail on the head. I was speaking to the doctor and she said she can try everything to cure her, but she said there is less than a 20% chance of her making it, and even if she did that she would be in constant pain, and that her body most likely would not be able to recover. He would never purr again, or lick me fingers, or lay on my feet or curl up on my chest or steal my stuffed animals. Copyright © 2020 Laurie Pawlik-Kienlen. I’ve gone through my fair share of pain and loss in my life, but I’d never felt this kind of pain before. I know with time the feeling of guilt will go away; when the guilt creeps in, I need to remind myself that these kitties are here now because of all the love that Luna taught me to have, and her departure from this realm has left such a big space in my heart that I now have the capacity to give and receive love from these to 2 beautiful beings. Today a coworker sent me a picture of a kitty that needs a home and it felt like a ‘yes’ as soon as I saw him. Less than 30 seconds later after the injection, she was gone. I feel so empty now. He was our everything, our sweet, magical boy. Luna, there will never be another you, you will never be replaced. Problem is Miney left two brothers and I’m not sure they will accept him. Again, it depends on each person. At just over a year old, weighing 2.9kg she had exploratory surgery and a bowel resection. Well, the loss of a pet is indeed a very personal loss and should never be trivialized nor should you be judged for grieving, which we all have the right to do, and as long as needed. I managed to get her to play and then she started to love. My dog to lazy to climb stairs and stays with my mum since i came back home. I loved her so much, still do and honestly felt desperate for her and consumed with grief after her death. I had my husband ask the vet when and if we should have him…I can hardly say it ..put to sleep. The only comfort of having it done wild be knowing I wad with him and that he wild go without pain.in cherishing every moment with him,but like when I stumbled upon this Blessed site,he asked me to cry and hold him and talk to him and tell him I wished that he could tell me what he wanted me to do. When I opened the results picture, the kitty looked almost identical to Smokey. If I bought her toys she would prefer playing with the bag and box it came in. Zadoorian, Michael. After the death of a pet, it is advisable to keep the normal daily routine of any remaining pets in the household as unchanged as possible. I adopted her and bottle fed her for weeks. I wasn’t sure what to expect; I am still definitely grieving the loss of Luna but at the same time, my heart is warming up to Aurie and Sofie. I told her I wasn’t going to put him through anymore tests, it was time to let him go. Here’s another article that may help – especially the comments from other readers: How to Cope With the Pain of Missing Your Cat An active and assertive cat may overwhelm quieter and more timid cats, making introductions difficult. Would if I do forget some things about her, just writing that sentence makes me a little nauseous. But my little girl kitten keeps me busy and gives me a new adventure. I need help I don’t know what to do. Honestly, I feel like it’s helped me a little bit. You will be adding to Oliver’s legacy. It’s just so surreal that she is gone. I was doubled over. Thank you so much for your words as you go through your own grief. The Other One Is All Alone Now. I called the vet, frantic. My 23 year old Tuxedo cat ( Mitzi ) passed away from a combination of renal failure and the ravages of old age.. I feel like if I get a new kitty or kitties it means I’m throwing Smokey away in a sense/ abandoning her, like I don’t care about her, or I’ll forget her. She was a lovely cat who I was very fond of. I think you’re right, Petrie is watching from above and probably purring with joy that you’re not lonely :), “When you lose your beloved cat, they take a piece of your heart with them. What you said has helped with my fear that I’m betraying her memory. They asked if I wanted them to keep trying but he was in so much pain I had to make the decision to let him go. I’m only 21, this is the first time really any individual close to me has died. I’m still crying. Her death has caused me so much pain and I miss her so so much. For now I have my baby here to help me,but I’ve been thinking maybe my son is right,when my Sam is gone,there needs to be a kitty there to snuggle with n talk to it about how their bother Sammy was n how much I miss him n need the chance to give that kind of love to a new baby. Maybe he thought your Chasca somehow was the head of the household and he was afraid of her……Or maybe he thought Chasca was taking you away….No one knows what really goes on in a kitty’s head. This is my fisrt loss of a pet and it is painful and hard to deal with. May you realize you did the best you could with what you knew at the time. All rights reserved. The Dogs Trust Canine Care Card , gives the charity the opportunity to rehome pets when a dog owner dies. I also believe that animals here on earth need homes, and if we can open our homes and lives to a new pet, then we shouldn’t hesitate! Give yourself time to heal. He had a urinary tract infection, and we had to get him unblocked. I am learning through everyone’s posts that this is extremely normal and a part of grieving. We have been talking about getting her a friend for a few months now, because she really liked being around other cats; she spent the first year of her life before I moved out with four others. Busters death was not an ‘accident’, he should have been safe indoors and he wasn’t. It may be tempting to rush out and fill the void left by your pet’s death by immediately getting another pet. Much to our surprise she had a very large, ulcerated tumor under her tongue. from abuse,starvation,a fight with another animal,hit by a car,suffering from the cold,OMG so many possibilities! My sister said she will take me to a shelter when shelter in place is lifted. She is bringing me a lot of joy and happiness. I didn’t see Millie’s name anywhere so we ended up back at the front door greeted by the friendly kitty again. I go to bed with a box of ashes on my bookshelf. I dont know what to make of this as it is so different from what I experienced previously. It seems like the pain will never end. Kellie B. Gormly Again, there is no “right” or “wrong”. I have been offered another kitten who will be ready in 5 weeks. I found the kitten I want, but I don’t know if I should get her or not. I began my walk through the garage to pick her up from the driveway when I saw the tailgate my husband had taken off the pickup and propped in the garage. I feel your pain! âI highly recommend getting a new cat after your catâs death,â says Julie on Comforting Prayers After the Loss of a Beloved Pet. It was during this transition that I noticed he was going blind, his retina detached due to high blood pressure. My husband often teases me that I love our dogs more than I love him – and I think he’s jealous that I don’t cook for him the way I cook for our dogs! We’ve tried over the yrs. This time we decided to go to the shelter for a visit, see how our former fosters were doing and take a look around. I start sobbing the moment I think about her. The race to the vet was like it was in slow motion. She had actually brought her toy up on my bed the day before & I had made her a paper ball which she loved to fetch & bring back. You may notice a grieving cat meowing more than usual, and some grieving cats lose interest in their surroundings. Kaylee, I’m so sorry for your loss. Thank you for sharing your story, because you’ve given Jake a permanent place in history. When you think about adopting a kitten or cat, do you feel a red light or a green light? This sucks. She acted as though she didn’t care. I feel hollow and empty. I got her just after I was discharged from hospital (I was there for depression and suicidal tendencies), I was really struggling so I decided to rescue her. at the same time, I find myself looking at the rescue web page where my boss volunteers, and the humane society, looking at the cats there and feeling so lost and alone and ashamed. We got her straight in for another ultrasound and our fears were confirmed. Our vet suspected Squamous Cell Carcinoma and recommended a biopsy. But I picked out one, a different color and a sweet personality. It was horrible to see him like that. The article says to “tune in to your intuition, trust your gut instincts” — I feel like with a cat we met today, it was much like when Luna came into my life. Feline infectious peritonitis is a deadly disease in kittens and adult cats, and if one of your pets recently passed away from it, any concern in adopting a newbie may have some validity. When you have a loyal loving companion by your side, in your lap everyday, as well as sleeping by your head every night! We think maybe she might have been abused. This might be a more gentle way to ease your way into another pet after your cat’s death. Fast forward to March of this year (2020). I’d stand at the bottom of the stairs and hold it above my head. That was day in and day out until one day I brought home a new fish in a bowl. But I’m so stuck. She said she was going to take him in the back and get his temperature. This is the first time I’ve actually written or talked about my situation sincerity happened. Thumbnail: Photography by vladans/Thinkstock. It’s 100% possible that adopting another cat will help you grieve Jacob’s death and be happy again! It was then I knew that this was going to be his last trip and that his Tour of Duty was coming to a titered end. I felt that all his life he knew I saved him. I miss those that go, very much, but I know they are always with me and that brings me peace. My heart goes out to you and your grandkids. He was an outdoor cat for 5 years but in the last 5 month before his death I had moved out of my parents and into an apartment where he became indoor. No interested in food. I had to decide. He was a big, orange tabby…FULL of personality, noise and love. Hang in there. I feel the same way. I do know his sister also passed very young. She LOVED to be outside! I have no closure. They’re a needed distraction from the grief, and something good to balance out the horrible. Her mother has died shortly after her birth and the owners weren’t sure if she was going to make it since she was the runt. A storm knocked out the power and I crawled on the floor reaching for him. My best friend suggested that I get a kitten. He was my first pet, my children’s first pet, and for whatever reason I have never felt comfortable with animals of any type. How what why when where and who are all going through my mind right now and I just keep coming back to why! sorry to hear your loss and the same was happened to me . You really have some beautiful memories of your life with Babe and that is very precious. Up at 5:30 am sometimes earlier, to get his treats, go outside too get some air, come back in wants his breakfast of wet food. Their only downfall is that they leave us far too soon. My Precious Little boy Tbear Sterling, Siberian passed recently just 3 /12 weeks ago. 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